Calling Beth

Here’s another blog entry you can read or listen to as I recorded it for the Grantcast.  If you want to subscribe to the Grantcast, you can do so with iTunes, or by using this feed in your favorite podcatcher.  Enjoy!

Calling Beth
By Grant Baciocco

I solemnly promise that this blog is not going to become a collection of old girlfriend stories, but I do have one more to tell. And actually, this story is less about a girl than it is about my own stupidity.  Although, those two things often go hand in hand.

My first girlfriend in college was a theatre major, like myself. Her name was Beth and she was studying costuming and was a year ahead of me. We hit it off pretty well when she was doing costumes for a play I was in and we started going out. This was in the fall of 1992.

As we approached Christmas, she got the opportunity to go study in Europe over the winter break. We promised to keep in touch while she was gone.

I lived in the dorms at Long Beach State all four years of college and, like most dorms did back then, we had a unique phone system. It was almost like a hotel. You had to dial a special number to dial out. It also allowed you to call into a special number and find out how much you owed on your bill. It was a little clunky, but it worked.

Beth took off to Europe and I stayed in Long Beach. I was taking a few classes during winter break, so I stayed back in the dorms during that time. Beth and I had planned to talk on the phone just a few times because the bills would be huge. She’d call me one week, then I’d call her the next. Well, after the first phone call I made to her, I called into the central computer to see what my bill was. I was fearing the worst, but was pleasantly surprised that my phone bill had only ticked up about five dollars.

Five dollars?! For a thirty minute phone call to Europe?! These were great rates.

The next time Beth and I talked on the phone I told her that, from then on, I would call her and we could talk as long as we wanted. And you’d better believe we did. For the next two weeks, almost daily. My phone bill crept up by teeny tiny amounts after each call. Probably spent a good thirty dollars in phone calls over the rest of the break.

Finally, the first day of the Spring semester rolled around and the students returned to campus and the people that ran the phone systems returned to the office. The first moment I knew I was in trouble was when we received a campus wide voicemail from the people that ran the phone company.

“Residents, we just wanted to inform you that over the winter break there was a small glitch in the reporting of the phone calls over the winter break. We will be fixing that glitch over the next few hours. Until we are caught up, your final amounts due will be incorrect.”

I frantically called into the system. My bill was $50 more than it had been the last time I’d checked. With a feeling like I had been punched in the gut, I spent the rest of the day calling into the system and listening as my bill rose higher and higher.

When the dust settled, I had made over $350 in calls to Europe. I swallowed my pride and paid for it, partially, with the money I had got as gifts for Christmas.

Beth and I broke up later that semester after she got home from Europe. When it was over, she brought me a garbage bag with all the things I had ever given her in it. Sadly, there wasn’t $350 in the bag.

©2015 Grant Baciocco/Saturday Morning Media

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Jackass on a plane.

Happy Saturday.  Here’s a recent true story about a fun travel experience.  You can listen to it via the player below or just read it.  The choice is yours.  If you want to hear more stories (some of which aren’t on this blog) subscribe to the podcast in iTunes, or by using this feed in your favorite podcatcher.  Enjoy!

Jackass on a plane
By Grant Baciocco

It had been a long weekend. I had travelled to Atlantic City to film the second season of The Ultimate Nerd-ament. Traveling with me were fellow puppeteer Russ and our director Dave. There had been a lot of headaches leading up to the trip, just in the planning of the trip and making sure we would have everything we needed for the production once we went got to Atlantic City. It had been a bumpy road.

The filming had gone well. We got the footage we needed, and we even got to do a cool guest puppet appearance with director Kevin Smith. As good as it went, however, the travel plan mess ups were kind of outweighing the good of the trip, no matter how hard we tried to remain positive. So, at the end of three long days, we were sitting in the Philadelphia Airport waiting for our flight home to Los Angeles.

The first warning that things were not going to go well, came when we were told that the inbound plane was going to be late. About an hour late. We weren’t too worried because out path was taking us from Philadelphia to Washington D.C. then on to LA. We were scheduled to have a one hour and thirty minute layover in D.C., so we’d just be having the layover in Philadelphia instead. But then they announced even further delays that would make our connection in D.C. pretty tight. Finally, the inbound plane arrived and everyone worked together to board quickly and be ready to go.

The plane we were flying to D.C. on was a small plane. Each row only had three seats and you had to gate check any bags bigger than a backpack. Everyone complied with this rule. Except for The Jackass. The Jackass was this guy, probably in his early fifties, loud, brash, everything going wrong in his life was everybody else’s fault. When we were boarding, he couldn’t call his boarding pass up on his phone. This was, somehow, United’s fault. When he finally got on the plane, he was determined to bring his carry on suitcase on, even after being told repeatedly that it would not fit in the overhead bins.

“Sir, that bag is not going to fit in the overhead. You’ll have to gate check it.” The flight attendant said politely.

“I have a 5 minute turnaround in D.C.!” The Jackass said loudly. “You have to let me bring it on.”

“Sir, it’s not going to fit.” She replied.

“At least let me try!” he shouted and pushed past her.

“Fine.” The flight attended said, resigned. “You can try. It’s not going to fit.”

Well, The Jackass marched to his seat and those who had already boarded watched as he tried to cram his roller bag into the overhead bin that was, plainly, far too small for the bag. He pushed and shoved and, to his credit, got most of it in. Enough of it, that he tried to close the bin. The moment he started to try and close it, the bin started going off the tracks because the bag was not letting it close right. I leaned over to Russ, who was sitting across the aisle from me and said, “He’s going to break the door.”

Russ, whose wife worked for Jet Blue, loudly said, “If he breaks it, this flight is going nowhere because it’ll be a service issue.”

The Jackass heard him, but was determined to get the bin closed.

The Flight attendant, seeing the bin warping, came down the aisle, “Sir, if you break the bin we’ll be stuck here because we’ll have to call maintenance.”

The Jackass, determined, continued to pull, as hard as he could, on the door. There was a pop and the door came off the track and wedged tight. At this moment, The Jackas says, angrily, “Fine, I’ll gate check my bag!”

He sat in his seat as the flight attendant took his bag off the plane to gate check it. Then she calmly walked down the aisle to the bin and tried to close it. Of course, it wouldn’t budge. She walked to the cockpit and, a moment later, the captain came down to try and close it. The Gate Agent boarded the plane and tried to help as well. Finally, The Jackass got up and tried to assist. The captain walked back to the cockpit and the PA system clicked on.

“Ladies and gentlemen, we have a small maintenance issue and will be unable to take off until it is fixed. We will be delayed here in Philadelphia a little longer until it is fixed.”

Russ was furious, “You broke the door, now we’re all going to miss our flights!”

The entire plane hated The Jackass. So, what did he do? He just got up and left the plane. No apology to the rest of us, he just got up and walked out. About 15 minutes later we saw the Gate Agent retrieving The Jackass’ bag from the plane’s cargo hold and return it to the terminal. The coward was running away, leaving us to deal with the delay.

We got to Washington D.C. to watch as our flight to Los Angeles pulled away from the gate. We were now in Washington D.C. for the night. No luggage. No change of clothes or toiletries. Just our carryons. United did give us hotel and meal vouchers. But we are left to wonder what The Jackass got.

©2015 Grant Baciocco/Saturday Morning Media

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100 Word Story – Police Blotter – Squirrelly

Welcome back to another 100 word story based on an item from the police blotter from my hometown of Burlingame, California.  The actual item and link to the police blotter in which it appeared is below.  Enjoy!

Squirrelly
By Grant Baciocco

“He’s right outside the door.” Dorothy said slowly.  Her whisper barely audible to the 9-1-1 Operator on the other end of the line.

“What is he doing ma’am?” the Operator asked.

“I don’t know.” Dorothy gasped, breathlessly.  “I think he’s listening for me.”

Dorothy heard the Operating typing on the other end of the phone line.  “And you say he’s been stationed there all morning?”

“Yes.” Dorothy whispered.  “He’s just been staring at the front door.”

“Ma’am, I have officers on the way.” The operator said fimly, “Please just stay exactly where you are.”

“Yes.” Dorothy replied, crying.

Rollins Road, 8:16 p.m. May 5 A squirrel reported to be stationed at a front entrance and blocking a fearful resident’s exit moved along by the time an officer arrived.

©2015 Grant Baciocco/Saturday Morning Media

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Failure

Here’s another entry you can read or listen to via the Grantcast.  If you want to hear more stories (that aren’t on this blog) subscribe to the podcast in iTunes, or by using this feed in your favorite podcatcher. Thanks!

Failure
By Grant Baciocco

Recently, I have started to become really fascinated with failure.  It kind of started when I was reading the Jim Henson Biography by Brian Jay Jones.  Of course, failure is the furthest thing that you think of when you think of Jim Henson.  He created The Muppets, for pete’s sake!  I know this, but I was totally fascinating with the projects he attempted to get going before, and even after, creating The Muppets.  One of my favorites is a pilot he shot in 1962 called Tales of the Tinkerdee.

This was a half hour pilot for a puppet TV show that was geared at both adults and kids.  A very early pre-cursor to the type of show The Muppet Show was when it began airing.  Fun for all ages.  Jim shot the pilot, in Atlanta I believe, and you can watch the whole thing on YouTube.  It’s fun, filled with puns and mistaken identity, but it never went anywhere.  Jim reused some of the elements of Tales of the Tinkerdee in future productions and even tried to remount the show in a different format, but it never gained any traction.  An interesting side note is in this production, Kermit played a wandering minstrel and he wore a spiked collar for the first time.  The collar he’s had ever since.

Currently I’m reading The Moose that Roared by Keith Scott.  It is the story of Jay Ward who created Rocky & Bullwinkle, Peabody & Sherman, Dudley Do-Right and so on.  I was surprised he had a lot of projects that turned out to be non-starters as well.  For a long time he wanted to do an American Bandstand type show but with jazz musicians.  He couldn’t ever get it made.  Part of the reason it never saw the light of day was that he came down with a crippling bout of agoraphobia that made him practically unable to leave his house.  He still created while suffering from it, but he was unable to make it to important meetings to help try and get his ideas made.

If you’ve known me for any length of time, you know that I’m a big fan of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 creator Joel Hodgson.  Joel has often talked about releasing a coffee table book that chronicles all the projects he and his brother Jim have pitched over the years that never saw the light of day.  It’s amazing to me that they have enough of these projects to fill a whole book!

No, I’m not interested in all these failures because I get some sort of morbid joy out of it.  I find these failures inspiring.  Tales of the Tinkerdee didn’t make it, but Jim went on to create The Muppets.  Jay Ward didn’t get his jazz show on the air, but he went on to create Rocky & Bullwinkle.  Joel Hodgson has enoug projects that never made it to fill a coffee table book yet, he still created Mystery Science Theatre 3000.

To me, this shows that if one project doesn’t make it, you don’t pack it all in and give up, you keep creating.  Who knows?  The projects after your most recent failure might be the next Muppets or Rocky & Bullwinkle or Mystery Science Theatre 3000.

©2015 Grant Baciocco/Saturday Morning Media